I have sleep apnea

I’ve been tired for the last ten years. Really, really tired. In June, my therapist, whom I see for panic disorder and anxiety, suggested that I might want to ask my GP (General Practitioner – that’s my regular medical doctor) for a referral to a sleep lab to perform a sleep study. Maybe if we attached electrodes to my head all night long we might figure out why I’m so tired all the time.

“But I don’t snore,” I protested. He’s used to me protesting things. Anxious people aren’t known for their easy cooperation.

“It doesn’t matter, you could still have sleep apnea,” he said. “It would just be one night. Then you’d know.”

So I did. And they electroded me up right good:

I slept horribly that whole night; being wired up like that makes sleep as easy as you’d think. Finally, after what seemed like forever, I drifted off. It must have gone pretty well, they said that they got over seven hours of data.

A week later I got my results: mild to moderate sleep apnea. I was right, I don’t snore – but that’s because I’m not breathing. My momentary self-righteousness at knowing I slept like a lady dissipated when I considered that I slept like a dead one.

Suddenly, the whole last year came into focus; twelve months ago I’d complained to my GP that I had no energy after 5pm. Now I was complaining that I had no energy after 11am. I wake up, get maybe three or four hours of low-quality energy, and then I crash and spend the rest of the day just trying to hold on until the kids are in bed.

So what’s a girl to do? Well, I tried a CPAP machine for a few weeks, but couldn’t get used to it. I’m not alone, apparently only a third of people who are prescribed CPAP machines actually stick with them. It feels like going to sleep with an alien on your face, and we all know how that turns out.

I investigated my other option: an oral appliance. I love this phrase, it’s like I have a Cuisinart in my mouth. An oral appliance is basically a device similar to an over-the-counter mouth guard that you can buy any pharmacy, except the one that my orthodontist is making for me is made of hard plastic instead of silicone, is fitted to my teeth and jaw through a complicated series of castings, and costs a small fortune. The model I’m buying is the SomnoMed, which I’ve read many good things about. I get mine at the end of this month (it takes 3-4 weeks to make the device after the castings have been made), so hopefully by the end of October I’ll be reporting much better energy levels.